I rang in my birthday crying. Not a few tears, but heavy, sobbing, compounding pressure in your head crying. In a way it was a relief, because I thought the pharmacy on my bathroom sink had stolen that from me. I don’t think I’ve cried since mom passed. Life is rarely where you expect it…
Author: timpangburn
Artists are nonessential, so rethink your strategy
Lockdown day 38: I actually just counted the days on the calendar, because I barely know what day it is most of the time. That’s 38 days I’ve had my shop closed. 38 days without income. 38 days my staff has no income. As of now, we don’t even know when this will end. And…
Being in Quarantine is Traumatic
I’m a person who’s heavily focused on productivity and growth, and the quarantine is constantly grinding against my willpower. It’s been 27 days since they closed nonessential businesses, so that’s 27 days I’ve had no steady income. We’ve canceled every order and every account that isn’t essential. My amazing wife has spent weeks on calls…
I know where you can put your false positivity
I’ve been on home restriction for 20 days, and I’ve been promised at least 25 more. Now isn’t the time to lose our shit and spiral into depression and aggressive behavior. It’s also not the time to polish up our smiles and act like this is positive, or to downplay the severity of the situation….
Lockdown Day 5: I’m a Robot
I’d like to say no one saw this coming, but the signs were all right there in front of us. And I’d like to say it’ll all be over soon, but reality is a little more grim than that. We’re most likely still in the early phases of this, and things get worse before they…
Closure Announcement
Everyone’s lives are being affected by the coronavirus. Between school closures, shutdowns, and possible curfews, we’re all limited in our actions at this time. In order to stay responsible and follow safe practices, we will be closing Art Machine Productions until at least March 27th, as per governor’s order. If you currently have an appointment…
Staying Focused While…wait, what was I saying?
The eternal frustration in my life is lack of organization. Stacks of books and stacks of papers, boxes of knickknacks and broken typewriter keys. A thousand projects and no semblance of order to accomplish them. A brain that pushes out information almost as fast as it attains it. It’s not like I’m dumb, or the…
It’s official! I’m bipolar!
I’ll tell you what, sentience is a bitch. There’s days I’d rather have no knowledge of self and just be a slave to instinct, like an animal. Then I watch a video of a wild dog eating a gazelle alive and change my mind. It’s funny how such brutal and aggressive behavior is just natural,…
Uncertainty and Doubt During Periods of Growth
I’m pretty sure I don’t give enough to others. The greatest value I can be is through sharing my experiences. Not as an entrepreneur, or a recovering alcoholic, or artist, but as a human. When I struggle with my mental health, I draw parallels between myself and others. When I’m face to face with my…
Workhorse
It doesn’t matter how hard I work, I always think I should work harder. I know I shouldn’t have to prove anything to anyone, but I still try my damnedest, all the time. Or am I just writing that to sound cool? Like some sort of badass terminator motherfucker that never sleeps and stays on…